paper anniversary.

There is no safe investment. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket — safe, dark, motionless, airless — it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.
— C.S Lewis

As of today we’ve been married for one year, which means today is our paper anniversary.  I’ve heard people say that the first year is the easiest, and others say that it’s the hardest.  In my experience it wasn’t all that different from the previous two years we were together: full of happiness, laughter, and a tiny bit of hard work.   About two weeks after we started dating back in 2007 I posted the following:

“New boyfriend = excellent. Sends flowers, etc. Better than advertised.”

I was still skeptical at the time, and had no idea of just how excellent he would turn out to be.  I feel like the luckiest woman on the planet.  Here’s to many, many more anniversaries…

three years!

Now: 8.1.10, at Billy and Kathy's (amazing!) wedding.

I cannot believe we’ve been together for three years.  I feel like Dan’s still my “new boyfriend” sometimes.  But actually we’ve been friends for four years, have been together for three years, and we’re swiftly approaching our first wedding anniversary.  We’ve been together for longer than I’ve ever been with anyone, and we’ve had a happy marriage for longer than either of us has had a happy marriage.  Milestones!  Exciting!  We celebrated on Friday by trying out Pescado’s China Street (delicious food, horrible tacky decor) and going to a movie: just a quiet night together.

In the interest of not regurgitating the same old stuff, what I said last year and the year before still applies.  I love this guy in the moments when he drives me up the wall, and in the moments when he swoops in and saves my life.  How wonderful to have a partner as attentive and truly caring as he.  Half of the time he’s traveling, or we’re busy with various projects and committments, and I get to enjoy the aloneness I became so accustomed / addicted to during most of my twenties.  I love being able to have different pursuits, and to come back together and have interesting things to talk about and conflicting ideas to share.  And when we are together, I love working on common pursuits and enjoying the support and strength of our relationship, and that feeling that we can accomplish so much more together than we can apart.

Then: 7.30.07, at Westover Plantation.

Here’s to at least three more happy years.  At LEAST!

penultimate = just getting started.

This weekend has been non-stop, what with hosting a pre-wedding “Penultimate Bash” for Mandy and Ian, going to their wedding, meeting up with a new boss / friend for dinner and drinks, dancing dancing and more dancing, having some band dudes stay over, and finally getting to catch up on writing today.

The Penultimate Bash on Friday night was quite the memorable evening, complete with all manner of delicious food, a keg of Magic Hat, lovely paper garlands to add to the festivity of the backyard, a mustache-shaped pinata made by Mandy (filled with candy, liquor, and offbeat fortunes), and a raging living room dance party.  It was a great group, comprised of childhood friends, art school friends, comic book friends, death metal friends, Alabama friends, bookstore friends, and ghosthunting friends.  I love seeing how different types of people are connected through a couple, and how they’re all necessary.  I seems like when friends are so diverse, rather than all looking alike and being into the same exact things, they really have something to bring to each other.

The next day’s wedding in Mandy’s grandparents’ shady backyard included cool lemonade, oldies for toe-tapping, a huge meal of barbecue and mac n’ cheese, handmade clay planters by Ian’s mom, homemade barbecue sauce from the happy couple as favors, and tons of seersucker.

I’m still exhausted from all of this, but my spirits are high.  I’m so thankful to have shared in some beautiful weddings recently, and the reasons why I love these couples, both individually and together, have been occupying my thoughts quite a bit.

I’m off in a bit to the new Moment Mansion, for a cookout with Matt, Jenny, and lots of other people I love.  90-degree weather is no match for me today.  ❤

valentine’s day 2010.

On Saturday the power was out, so I caught up on about a year’s worth of magazines: several issues of ReadyMade, Relevant, and Virginia Magazine of History and Biography.

It was freezing, because when there’s no power there’s no space heater.  And no electric blanket.  When the power finally came back on, we curled up under the electric blanket, thawed out, and watched the first disc of Flight of the Conchords (hilarious!).

We exchanged gifts — I got Dan a steampunk tie tack and he got me some beautiful vintage earrings — and then got ready for dinner at Mamma Zu.  Although we got there right at opening time, the wait was already an hour long…so we decided to try the Belvidere.  We chose wisely.  It was delicious, and I enjoyed every bit of my crabcakes and vegetarian salade nicoise.  Afterward, Dan surprised me by driving us to the Byrd to see New Moon (for the, uh, third time in the theater).  So our evening was made complete by vampires.  Valentine’s Day WIN!

Yesterday I worked, and then we went to a talk at Shockoe Hill Cemetery called “Romances Beyond the Grave,” featuring Chris of the Poe Museum.  I personally don’t find anything more romantic than strolling through a snow-covered cemetery and then huddling in a tiny, brick caretaker’s shack to watch a slideshow about Poe.  Coffee and rainbow cookies really took the event from amazing to epic.  Another WIN!  The Friends of Shockoe Hill Cemetery put on the event, and they have a lot of rad plans for the cemetery that I can’t wait to talk more about soon in the Midnight Society blog.

We followed this up by a late lunch at Cici’s, sponsored by Jess Tyree’s amazing wedding gift of Cici’s Bucks.  Last night we stayed in and played some games, finding that we’re pretty much at a standstill as far as Jenga, Harry Potter Uno, and Dr. Mario are concerned.  It’s like playing board games and video games against yourself, we’re so equally matched.  We ended the evening with Dan reading to me aloud from Tom Sawyer while I rolled my hair in curlers.  Looking over the past couple of days I have to admit that although it was the perfect Valentine’s Day weekend, it’s not very different from a typical weekend we would have.  Which just serves to remind me of how fortunate I am.


two years!



This morning I woke up to a copy of the adorable Never Mind Your P’s and Q’s: Here’s the Punk Alphabet on my desk along with a lovely card from Dan.  Today is the two-year anniversary of the day that we began dating.  We’ve been through so much that part of me is like “really, just two years?” but then again, being with him makes the time fly by so quickly that part of me is like “really, two years already?”  Soon we’ll be celebrating a different anniversary, but even so these last two years have meant the world to me: an amazing time full of adventure and change, peace and calm.  Everything I said last year still holds true, and then some.  WIN!