Tomorrow we’re going to check out the Valentine Richmond History Center and see if having a wedding there would work out. In many ways this would be perfect for us. I shouldn’t have to list all the reasons, so I’ll give you two hints: extreme Richmond pride, and boxwoods. We’ll see how it goes. Anyway, it’s helpful to know how many guests are on your list in order to reserve a site. The Valentine only accommodates 150 people. Just our basic families constitute about 80 people, and I’ve been to about 50 peoples’ wedding in the past few years. This presents a problem.
Ever since I started going to one million weddings (a couple of years ago?) I always knew that the part I would HATE about planning a wedding would be the cutting down of the guest list. Every time I throw a party I invite nearly every single person I know. I’m lucky to have so many awesome, interesting, lovely friends and I want them near me as much as possible. And so for years, every time I’ve thought about the concept of drawing a line and deciding whom to invite, I’ve hyperventilated. Now we’re here at the real thing! And it is fearsome.
Dan and I sat down and very rationally and democratically cut our huge list of about 250 people (and those are just the essentials! — argh!) to an “A” list of 186. I want to cry when I look at the “B” list, thinking about the concept of those people not being at my wedding. Perhaps we will do a webcast? But no, that’s taking it too far. We had to be realistic and put aside questions like “Do I genuinely care about this person?” and “Is this person a fantastic addition to any party?” and instead ask questions like “Do we see this person very often?” and “Is this person a good friend of ours as a couple, or just one of us?” It was hard to do, but I’m glad the majority of the list-making insanity is over. I know that there are constraints that I just can’t get around, and I think that friends will understand that as well and not consider themselves snubbed. I feel like sometimes brides say “oh yeah I really wanted to invite you, but…” but I seriously mean it. I really did want to invite basically everyone.
We’ve had a lot of Father of the Bride moments, and I’ve been itching to watch that movie. I can’t figure out if it’s because it’s so relevant right now, or if I usually watch it once every couple months and I haven’t in a while.
On the other hand, I love doing this stuff. At the bookstore the other day, I had a hard time not buying every etiquette book in the place. Those suckers are strategically placed next to the wedding books for all the bridezillas (or lovers of Emily Post) out there.
I’ve had a difficult, busy, stressful week. Mostly at work though. Despite the planning frenzy here at home (on top of the moving out and moving in that’s going on here at the Spine), I’m happier than ever. I’ve probably set a new record for smiling this week. I keep reminding myself to focus on what’s important and not what’s temporary or insignificant.
Today I got a card in the mail from Kelsey. It was short and simple and melted my goth girl’s heart with its sweetness. Huzzah for Kels for sending the only snail mail congratulations we received! I love getting snail mail. This card was the best thing I could have possibly gotten in the mail after trudging home from the office feeling all drained and zombie-like.
Lastly, I’d like to give shout-outs to some of my faithful readers. Even if I don’t know you, I want you to know that I see your location many, many times a day in my stats, and well…I love you too. Auburn, CA — Rego Park, NY — somebody on the southside — I love you all! I am glad I am important to you. Thanks for letting me blog it out on your very valuable time.
P.S. If anyone wants to see the bizarre spectacle of me being out on a Tuesday night, come out to the Artists Underground on Tuesday to see The Blue Letter!